The truth about men, women, and sex
by Mark Regnerus, MercatorNet:
The surprising avalanche of publicized sexual misdeeds rolls on, picking up actors, executives, and politicians along the way. What each are guilty of no doubt varies widely. But the court of public opinion is in no mood for fine distinctions.
What interests a sociologist is less the scope of the purge, its timing, or predictions about who’s next than what it all reveals about the social structure of sexual interactions between men and women, and how change here could actually happen. The revelations of late have plenty to do with the exchange model of sexual behavior, which is and will remain an accurate lens through which to understand sex. (There are other sensible lenses, too.)
The “Weinstein avalanche” highlights three stable observations about men, women, and the relationships they form. Ignoring them in the name of virtue signaling will not help. But it may require new perspective to guide our way forward toward less sexual aggression.
Three blunt – but essential – truths
First, men’s sex drives are, on average, stronger and less discriminating than women’s. If this were not true, we would not be talking about this in the first place. Men’s arousal patterns are effective at commanding their attention. With this biological tendency comes not only the next generation, but plenty of present-day risk.
Who’s on the sex offender registry? Men. Many seem ready to jeopardize career, marriage, family, and reputation – all because of genital urges. Women’s interest in sex tends to be more diverse in origin and goal. But some, we know, have sex for the social status it may foster – sleeping with a rock star or pro athlete – while a few have sex in order to get ahead.
This highlights an aspect of the exchange model many find loathsome – that men can employ their status, and the promise of work or the threat of retaliation, as a resource to help coax (or else gain access in order to coerce) sex from women. Despite how much moderns pine for equality, “(s)ex is an impediment to any idealism,” as one observer recently put it.
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