Why People Are Fighting to Get Polyamory Recognized as a Sexual Orientation
by Neil McArthur, Vice:
Melissa Marie Legge always knew she was different—she just felt it, even before she knew how to talk about that feeling. “Wherever this part of me came from, it has certainly always been there, even before I had words to describe or explain it,” she told VICE. “Consensual non-monogamy gives me the freedom to involve people in my life on my own terms, and to negotiate relationships individually and contextually without having to follow a social script. It’s something that I value highly, and that I would say is a big part of my sexual identity overall.”
That’s how Marie Legge describes being polyamorous, and somewhat controversially, identity is the precise word she uses. While we commonly think of sexual orientation in terms of the gender we’re attracted to, some in the non-monogamy community—a.k.a. those who, defined broadly, have relationships with multiple people simultaneously—say the practice should be considered a “relationship orientation,” recognized in the same way as one’s sexual or gender orientation. In other words, they seek the same social acceptance and legal protections we increasingly grant gays, lesbians, and trans people.
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