By Seth Troutt, TGC. (photo: Ben White/Unsplash)
You’re in the church lobby on Sunday morning when a woman in her mid to late 30s walks in for the first time. You welcome her, show her where the coffee is, and give her a first-time-guest gift. You ask, “What brought you to church this Sunday?” She responds, “Well, there are a lot of theories out there about which church is right, but I know that’ll get sorted out when Jesus comes back, so I’m not preoccupied with theological specifics. I’m not exactly sure what I’m looking for.”
“That’s OK,” you respond. “Sometimes God draws us to himself and we don’t know much else. Are you new to the area? Do you have family in town?”
“Sort of,” she says. “I’ve been married a few times, so I’m connected to a few different families. I’m currently living with someone.”
What do you do next? What narrative did you just write in your head about this woman? Is she a serial home-wrecker? Has she been abused by five men in a row, only narrowly escaping each situation? Is she a five-time widow with horrible luck?
What’s the right follow-up question? The moment is delicate. Questions are good, but they can easily become interrogations. What do we say when there’s so much we don’t know? Jesus once met a woman like this.
Awkward Conversation at the Well
In John 4, Jesus meets a Samaritan woman who’s been married five times. She’s currently living with a man who’s not her husband. She’s at the well around noon, in the heat of the day—an awkward time. It’d be like going to the grocery store at 5 a.m.