Memo to the heterosexual heterophobe: why not try chastity?
by Mary Harrington, UnHerd:
Slate yesterday published one of the saddest articles I have seen for a long time. A letter to Slate magazine’s dating advice column How To Do It, it outlines the dilemma of a woman who is attracted to males but politically opposed to heterosexuality…
…Meanwhile, one of the most profoundly countercultural pieces I have read recently on women and sexuality is Subversive Virginity (1998), published by the US Christian First Things. The author, Sarah Hinlickey, argues that contemporary culture views sexual encounters as a zero-sum power game:
[…] The Slate letter suggests a heterosexual woman, attracted to men but repelled by contemporary sexual politics. If Hinlickey’s analysis is accurate (and countless articles like this one about dating in the Tinder age do little to contradict it) then this perspective is both understandable and tragic.
The only way out of the mutually assured destruction of antagonistic dating culture, Hinlickey argues, is virginity: “a refusal to exploit or be exploited.” Far from being a state of oppression or repression, she argues, “That is real, and responsible, power.”
The Slate columnist’s response did not suggest celibacy. Chastity is perhaps the last remaining corner of countercultural taboo in the well-churned mud of the sexual revolution. But it may be gaining traction: a Guardian article published this week profiles women who found their lives improved after giving up sex.
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